The Grit Factor Podcast w/ Karl Jacobi

TGFP_Audio2_Ep19

00:00:00 Speaker: Average is the enemy of greatness. Comfort is the enemy of growth. Welcome to the Grit Factor podcast, where we strip away the highlight reel and get into the darkness beneath it. The real stories, the real battles, and the battle plans used to conquer them. I'm your host, Carl Jacobi, combat vet, entrepreneur, resilience and performance coach, keynote speaker, husband and father. I've built, scaled, and exited multiple companies totaling over forty million in revenue. But here's what that highlight reel doesn't show you. Life has been smacking me in the face with a two by four since I was just five years old. Broken home, constant chaos. No playbook. No safety net. Just grit. And if you're anything like me, you know you've got another level in you, in your business, your career, your faith, your leadership. You're just not sure how to get there. That's exactly why we're here. Be sure to follow me for more great content and check out my website. Success with Carl. Com. Now that's Carl with a K. Now let's get to work. All right. Today I have a special guest. This man has been selling online since two thousand and six. He built a one man operation, multiple six figure business from a rural northern Indiana town, selling everything from empty toilet paper tubes to heavy construction equipment. And this one I know for a fact, because you shared this as a real story the last time I got to see this guy. He teaches Thousands of people how to do the exact same thing. He homeschools all seven of his children. God bless your heart. He's a grandad of two. He's a musician. He's a coach. He's also a public speaker, man. And this story starts with the kind of phone call that no one is prepared for. Jeff, my dude, welcome to the show, man. Thanks, Carl. It's so great to be here, man. It's great to see you, my man. Just before we hit the the record, man, we're in that green room. Just sharing some sharing some stuff, man. You're already dropping some knowledge bombs, some wisdoms, like, well, I don't need this to be the only one to hear this, man. There's so many other people that need to hear this as well. So man, again, thank you for joining me. It's always amazing to spend some time with you and just to be in your presence and just, yeah, just to jam with you, man. So thanks. Thank you. Yeah, man. All right, Jeff, before we dive into the heavy stuff, man, paint me a picture. Right. Two thousand and six you start, you start selling online. What were you selling? You know, what would your life like back then? Right? I kind of gave this broad spectrum toilet paper tubes, I think is what I said. And also heavy construction equipment, like a bulldozer. Yeah. But so yeah, paint this picture, man. Okay, cool. So two thousand and six, uh, like I said, I had seven kids and all seven were at home. Uh, wife and I were schooling them at that time. And I was, I had a good factory job. Like I'd been working in factories for twenty years. And I was, I had a good job, like paid pretty decent, you know, and the Lord tapped me on the shoulder and said, hey, I want you to, uh, you're going to quit your job and become an entrepreneur. And I said, you are getting senile in your old age, aren't you? Because that does not mean right. He said, don't talk to me that way. Oh, man. But you know, so serious, man, that was my thought. You're nuts. You got the wrong Jeff, dude. So anyway, um, he just started introducing me to different things. Just changing my heart, change my thinking a little bit at a time. And my wife went along with me, which is how I knew it was from the Lord because, you know, she was always really good at, you know, calling me out on my bullshit, not letting me get away with stupid stuff. Right? Um, and one of those things was the idea of, of selling online. So I'm working in this factory and I open. Well, we already had an eBay account, but I thought, I'm going to start selling stuff on eBay just to see, you know. Yeah. Um, so the factory I was working at built high end RVs and things that were pulled off the line, like, say they changed the style of whatever. You know, stereo or a dash switch or something. Then the old stock would be pulled off the line and would it would go to these shelves and then over to the local auction house. So I asked him, hey, like, can I can employees buy this? They say, yeah, we don't care. You can buy whatever you want. So I started buying crap off of the off of the shelves and selling it on eBay. And my last year at the RV factory, I made fourteen grand on eBay, just selling random RV parts that I was pulling off the shelf. So that's how I got started, man. That's crazy man. Yeah. That's crazy. That's a great way to, to get started in something like that. You know, ironically in my prior life, you know, when I was coaching e-commerce entrepreneurs at Amazon and Walmart pretty much like what you do today still. Um, that was one of the very first things I asked every entrepreneur, look at your lowest hanging fruit, right? Look at the, the area that you, you know, whether it's somewhere where you work or maybe you have some relatives, like look in your lowest hanging fruit or whatever you can get into. And, um, but man, you crack me up, man. Uh, talking about how your, your shoulders getting tapped, right? Right. I love your, but one thing I, I forgot to, to mention in this that, uh, you know, we're, we're joined here and I didn't get the full spectrum of this, but you weren't an amazing shirt. I want to make sure this, especially those of you that are watching this on YouTube, I gotta say this now, you know, those of you listening on audio, sorry, you're gonna have to hop on over to YouTube. But Jeff is wearing his shirt as it says, stop whining. Start doing. There it is. There he is. There it is. My favorite shirt. There it is. My favorite shirt. I love it, man. Yeah. Hey, guys, take that action number one. Stop whining and start doing. Because for me, myself and Jeff just, you know, talked about he said he he needs this reminder too, right? We're not impervious to this. We often need these reminders. So thank you. Especially recording this on a Monday right after Easter. You know, I don't know about you, but I pretty pretty heavy on Easter, man. Yeah, buddy. So definitely my, my whole body is whining at four thirty this morning trying to wake up. Absolutely. But um, but man, thanks for sharing how it got started. Right? You know, the Lord tapped you up, you know, you're working in a factory, you're like, what? Because especially in working in a W-2 world, you get comfortable, right? You get comfortable. You get into the into this, the day to day grind, very reactive just to the day to day events. So I appreciate you sharing that because a lot of people are probably listening right now wondering, you know, or probably in that same season, right? You know, they, they're thinking about getting entrepreneurship or what have you, and they think it's not for them because they weren't, quote unquote, born to be an entrepreneur. Um, you know, so thanks for sharing this. So you're, you're into this for a while, right? Um, you know, by twenty fourteen, you got this business cranking and spanking seven kids, your wife life is rolling. And as you said in our green room, in what you call when you say abundantly blessed right in this position that you're in now, in that time of your life, you're probably in at that period of time. What did a normal day look like for the Clark household before August twenty fourteen? Right. Uh, so surprisingly, even though I was so successful that first year with eBay, I didn't get it through my thick concrete coconut here that that was that that is my superpower, right? Like I should have realized right away. Oh, geez. I'm, you know, hey, knucklehead. Right, exactly. Right. But my wife and I started a, uh, an editing and ghostwriting business, which I'll tell you. Wow. Yeah. Which I'll tell you, we were really, really good at what we did, but what we really, really sucked at was marketing ourselves and charging what we were worth. Yeah, I think a lot of people struggle with that. Yeah, yeah, for sure. So we ended up with some very, very lean years between two thousand and seven when I finally quit the factory in twenty fourteen. Um, like we had some scary, scary lean years right around two thousand and nine, twenty ten. Then things started to pick up a little bit. Um, and by twenty fourteen we were, we were doing okay. You know, um, my wife's health wasn't great in twenty fourteen, but we were still plugging ahead doing the things. And then, um, August of twenty fourteen, um, she had a sudden brain hemorrhage and, um, my life just completely stopped at that point. Uh, took her to the hospital and she laid in the hospital bed for five days, uh, with tubes and wires keeping her alive. And, You know, I spent those five days, you know, praying, speaking scripture and singing hymns and calling down and casting out and binding and loosing and you know, all the things. Everything I could think, every possible thing I could think to do. Right? Yeah. And of course, by, by Friday. So this happened, uh, Monday night. By Friday, my nerves were like this, you know? I just couldn't. I'm like, yeah, damn it, Lord, I've done everything I could think to do. Yeah. And yeah, serious, serious. Um, now. Okay, I'm going to back up in the ambulance ride. When they picked her up and I'm in the ambulance with her, the Holy Spirit said to me, you're going to know when to shut the machines off. And I said, get thee behind me, Satan. Don't you. Don't you mess with my. You know what I mean. I wasn't ready to accept that, you know? Yeah, yeah. But on. But on Saturday. Then on Saturday, uh, you know, some some things happened while I was while I was talking to her and praying over. And I just knew the moment to go tell the doctors, all right, turn, turn the machines off. And let me tell you something, Carl, if you. Carl, if if you. Wow. If you don't know that that's the Lord talking to you, you're going to question that decision the rest of your life, right? One hundred percent, dude. Right? One hundred percent. Yes. Yeah. One hundred percent. Yeah. So that's. Mhm. It was something else. You know, it was something else. Dude, I can't even fathom that man couldn't either. I either before. Because in that in that moment, you're sitting there, right? The average human being, myself included, I, I think I would be doubting myself, right? Like, am I hearing like, what voice am I really hearing? Right? Yeah. Like, what did I drink yesterday? You know, because I, I imagine exactly sleep. I imagine you'd probably hardly ate anything. Right? So there's probably a thousand thoughts going through your mind of like questioning like, okay, am I hearing this? Like, is this truly Gandalf or, you know? Right, right. I cannot imagine, I can't because I, I, I know a lot, there's probably a lot of parents that are listening to this or spouses or, or somebody, you know, that's listening to this, trying to picture themselves in that situation in that moment. Especially when you already Breathed right in the ambulance. Right. Hey, you're going to know when that time is going to come. And too many people to this. To your point, Satan, get away from me. Absolutely. How do you decipher how how do you decipher that? Like how, how you know, like, you know, help me understand. Like, how do you decipher? Sure. So here's, so here's the thing that, that I've learned and, and the Lord does this with me, man, he'll, he'll give me opportunities to practice listening to him. Like he'll put something on my spirit. And it's inconsequential. Like this just happened, like just a couple months ago, I was thinking about buying some wiper blades and it's okay. I don't need wiper blades right now. That's something in the future, you know, and the Lord really impressed on me. You need to go to advance and go by wiper blades today. And I'm like, it's not even raining. I think I know this is going. Are you going? It's not even raining. Wait, what are you talking about? Right. I looked at the forecast. It's not going to rain for the next week. Lord! Look here. Look right here, man. It's not going to rain for the next week. Don't you? You're nuts, man. But I couldn't shake it. Okay. And here's here's the key for me, Carl, is if if something like that comes with. For sure. I know it's not from God. Okay? Like, say I've got say I've got an extra. Say I've got a little pain or something or my heart's beating a little fast and I think. Oh, I should go see the doctor. Well then if my thoughts go, oh my gosh, I've got heart disease. I'm going to die. My kids are going to be. If all that shit comes, that's from the enemy, dude. That's not from the Lord, because the Lord does not. The Holy Spirit does not traffic in fear. Okay, he is the God of peace. So if I. So if I get a thing. That's right. If I get a thing that says go by wiper blades and I'm thinking, okay, you know, it comes with peace. Yeah, yeah. So and nothing. Here's the thing, Carl. It wasn't like a monumental thing. I didn't meet someone and lead them to Christ or, you know, I didn't save anyone's life crossing the road or anything. I just went there. Yeah. Got my wiper blades, and the dude, for some reason gave me a fifty percent discount. I didn't even ask for it. Like I just, I just said, and here's Jeff Clark. That's why that's why I guess I don't know, but it was just God saying, see, you should listen to me. Right? So he gives me opportunities. And that voice and that voice. See, I told you. I tell you, oh, it's got it. No way. It's got to be a Jewish voice. I told you, and I told you. Do you listen to me? No. It's like I'm. It's like I'm a salami. You don't listen to salami. What are you doing? Oh my gosh. But seriously. Okay. I get opportunities like that to to practice listening so that when it is important. Yeah. And the Holy Spirit says you're going to know when to shut the machines down. Now, I've had practice of, okay, I know that's his voice because I'm not. You know, when I heard that, I wasn't freaking about, Holy cow, how am I going to run our business by myself? How am I going to feed these kids? How am I going to school them? Take care of them. My youngest was eight years old at the time. Holy cow. Like I've talked to her in recent years, asked her, you know what memories she has of her mom. She doesn't remember a healthy, happy mom. Ooh, that's really hard for me. That's hard for me. Yeah, because the older six kids, they remember mom being fun and bouncing around with them and doing stuff. And my youngest, she just remembers mom sitting on the sofa because she wasn't feeling well and being scared, you know? So that's hard. Understandable. Yeah. But real quick, before we keep going, maybe life hit you hard. Business fell apart. Relationship ended. Health took a dive. Now you're standing in the wreckage wondering what comes next. Or maybe nothing blew up. On paper, you're winning. But inside something's off. You're not in crisis. You're at the crossroads. And the playbook that built this version of your life won't build the next one. Either way, you're stuck. Not broken. Stuck between who you were and who you're becoming. Most self-help just piles more weight on the load you're already carrying. I'm not doing that. I built the playbook method for this exact moment. Five pillars. That's it. The five preparatory shifts I walk every client through. By the end, you're clear. You're grounded, and you know exactly what's next. No fluff, no ninety minute webinar. Just the playbook free video series. You can start it tonight. Grab it at the playbook method dot com one more time. The playbook method dot com. It's free and it's the first real step toward your next version. Check it out, see if it speaks to you. And if it does, I'll see you inside. All right, let's get back to that conversation. I can imagine, especially especially as a parent, especially as a dad, especially, you know, with your, your girl, right? I mean, us fathers, I think we have a special place in our hearts for our girls. Oh, yeah. Oh my gosh. I think every, every father can relate to that. I know I do. Right. I love my all my kids. I love both my girls equally and especially as, uh, I don't know if you ever watched the movie The Shack. Yes. It was based. Oh, man, I love that movie. I love how she says, I'm especially fond of each of you. Right. Thus indicating you're not eating my favorites. But I'm especially fond of each of you because you each bring something unique, right? Yeah. Um, but, uh, it is, man, I don't have to watch that movie again because I really, you know, it's a good movie, man. Yeah, it is, but, uh, that's a great point, dude. Man. Dude, I think just in the first twenty minutes of our recording, right? Not even twenty minutes of this recording. You dropped more knowledge and wisdom than I probably have had in several months, man. Because you said something there that you got to learn to listen. Not by fear. If it is. If it's coming from a place of fear, it's not from God. It's not from from the Holy Spirit. And I think a lot of people that, myself included, especially right now, had to hear that because we hear these voices, we hear these these. Yes. Voices. Yeah, absolutely. Then we start questioning it is it is it, is it the devil? Or is it really the Holy Spirit? Is it God communicating to us? Man, I got goosebumps right now. Yeah, well, I mean, you can go back to you can go back to the Satan's first appearance in the Garden of Eden, you know. And he goes to he goes to he goes to Eve and he says, well, first of all, he questions God. Did God really say, you know, that kind of thing? But the other thing was, uh, he gave her FOMO, right? Hey, if you hate this man, you can, you can be like, God. Well, the truth is, she was already like God because man was created in God's image. So here's Satan lying around right off the bat. That's, you know. Right. You know. Yes. Yeah. That's all he's got really is is lies. That's all he's got. That's correct man. That's correct. Yeah. I hope everybody's listening taking action. I hope everybody's writing and taking notes. Like I, I like I've taken more notes in the first twenty minutes of our call. I've had any podcast interview. Um, so walk us in that moment in that week, right? Not just the five days, but after you've had to make that call, probably likely the toughest call you've had to make and maybe even will ever have to make. So you woke up the next morning. Seven kids, no wife. What do you do? Like, what did they two look like in your when your whole world just was rearranged, right? Right. Well, I remember waking up and seeing the sun shining and I said, what are you doing? Why are you shining? Don't you don't you know what happened yesterday? Or how can things. Yeah. How are things this like going on? Like you're going on like it's a normal day. It's not a normal day. There's nothing normal about this. Um, but plus I had, I had so many mitigating circumstances around this because the week after she died was, uh, Cochran's conference. Okay. And it was the second conference that he had put on in Dallas, and I had planned to go to it. Well, when she had her brain hemorrhage on Monday, I called Jim and I said, man, you know, pray for us. Dawn had a brain hemorrhage in the hospital. Um, or we're in the hospital. And I said, there's no way I can come to the conference next week. He said, no problem, dude. You know, we're praying for you. ET cetera, et cetera. So Saturday, um, she died at like just after noon, like twelve, fifteen. And that night, my kids sat me down and said, dad, we think you should go to the conference because mom was really excited for you to go. And we're fine here. There's nothing. You know, my oldest at the time was twenty four, twenty five. Okay. And still living at home. But they're all, you know, they're able to take care of each other. And she said, we're able, we can. We're fine here, but we think you will. You would honor mom if you went to the conference. I'm like, wow, I would have never suggested that. But because you kids brought it up. Yeah. You know, I will. I'll honor your your suggestion. So yeah, Wednesday, literally two kids came with me and we drove straight from the cemetery fifteen hours to Dallas to go to, to go to the to the conference. This is from northern Indiana, from northern Indiana to Dallas. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And that was that was a great experience, first of all, because, you know, as you know as well as I do, Jim's community is nothing but love, you know, and they just they showed me so much love. It was, it was amazing. I made lifelong friendships there. Um, but also I changed my business model entirely because like I said, Dawn and I had been editing and ghostwriting, right. And I was doing some selling on the side, some eBay, some Amazon, some whatever. Sure. Um, but after she died, I was like, well, what am I supposed to do now? I can't yeah, yeah, I can't do our business by myself. I'll just cry on my keyboard every day. I'm not going to get anything done. And so he said, well, why don't you why don't you flip it around, you know, make your make your selling full time. And if you want to do some editing on the side, that's, that's cool. So I went, I went berserk, man, that first week. You know, I got home from the conference. I went out and just went nuts. Going to garage sales and retail stores and estate sales and everything I could just went berserk. Uh, buying things to, to resell. And three months later, I had my first five figure month that I'd ever had in my life. Wow. And I'm like, oh, this is what I was supposed to be when I grew up. I'm fifty one years. I'm fifty one years old. And I finally figured out what I'm supposed to be when I grow up. Right, right. You're ahead of me. Yeah. Yeah. Serious. Serious. So then that first year, I had a six figure year for the first time in my life. That's incredible. Very first year. So it's incredible. Yeah. So life was way different. Life was way different. Um, I was impressed. Yeah, I was impressed by, um. I had heard, I think it was Rabbi Lapin. Rabbi Daniel Lapin, who was talking about ancient Jewish wisdom. And he said at something, at some point, I heard him talking about grieving, and he said, Ancient Jewish tradition is that you take a year to grieve. And I thought, that sounds interesting. That sounds that sounds pretty wise. So I decided I'm going to take. And that first year, it was really fascinating. I understand why you need to take a year because you hit all of the the notable dates. Yes, of course, anniversary and Christmas and kids birthday and whatever. But then there's, there's also those dates that aren't on the calendar, like, oh, this is when we went up to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan and spent a week together. Oh, this is when, you know, we had our first date or whatever. You know what I mean? And you're experiencing all those things suddenly without your partner. I remember about a month. That was part of it. Part of it was figuring out who am I? Because it's for thirty years. We were married for thirty years. For thirty years, it's Jeff and Don, Jeff and Don Jeff and Don Jeff. Wow. Thirty years, thirty years. We were married. And then all of a sudden, it's. Wow. Jeff. Well, who the hell is Jeff? I don't know this guy. I don't know him. Literally, a month after she died, I was at Starbucks with all seven of my kids. And my oldest says, daddy, what do you want to drink? And I said, venti, Oklahoma, one hundred and eighty degrees. And she said, no, dad, that's what you and mom always got. What do you want? Oh, and I started crying. I'm like, I don't even know what kind of coffee I drink. I don't know. I'm serious. I was I was a mess. But that's what that's part of. What that first year is about is figuring out who am I. So I would I deliberately went to places and did things that she and I did together to see if is this still part of me or is this something that was great for us? And I can set it aside and say, that was wonderful. And so I had both of those things happen. You know, I'd go somewhere and I'd go, yeah, this was so much fun with Dawn, but this isn't me. And so I put that away. You know, it's a great memory. I'd go somewhere else and I'd go, I really like this. Okay, I this can continue to be me. And then I had to discover new things that I never did with her. So you understand there's there's a blend there, right? There's things that that continued on that I still do to this day that she and I did together. There's things that I picked up Top brand new in that first year. My trombone. I had not touched my trombone since high school. Thirty years. My trombone sat in the closet. And in that first year I heard a local jazz band and I thought, oh, that's something. That's what I want to do. So I pulled my trombone out of the closet and I sounded like, shit, I sounded terrible. Well, I mean, thirty years. Holy cow. I don't know why they let me in the band, but for some reason, they. They felt sorry for you. Yeah, I guess, I guess. So that was that was eleven years ago. And today, playing my trombone is one of the purest joys of my life. I play with four different bands now, and I have an absolute blast, and I am a far better player than I ever have been. That's incredible. So much fun. Let me let me unpack this for a moment because I don't think you realize this, but you dropped even more actionable things, more wisdom that folks that are likely navigating this season. The season that you navigated. You know, how long ago was this to happen? Uh, that was so she died twelve years ago this August. And understand, like taking that year to grieve thing, it doesn't have to be the death of a spouse or even the death of anyone. So I'm sorry to interrupt you, but in twenty twenty. No. You're good. I got married again, and eighteen months later, she left me. Oh, no. And. And moved to Alaska. And so I know. And when we signed the divorce papers, I'm like, okay, Lord, I'm going to take another year and grieve. Yeah. This. Yeah. It's not a death, but it's a it's a traumatic event. So it's still a loss. It's still a loss. Literally any kind of loss you experience. I think taking a year to grieve is a good, good way to process it. Well, I agree with you and thanks for for sharing and thank you for interrupting me because that needed to be disclosed because it adds a little more context, right? But for those that are that are navigating some type of loss needs to go through this period of grieving because unfortunately, and you answered the question I even asked you because you were talking about record maker, record breaking months and then a record breaking year. And I'm like, I'll say, looking outside, listening in, I'm thinking, man, did this brother take time to grieve because it seemed like you're channeling or not necessarily channeling? Yeah, you're channeling your efforts, but you were allowing yourself to grieve. You're just building and building and building because you're as a father, your back was against the wall. You're like, there's no time to grieve here, right? I have to get moving. I have to be the provider. I have to be the mother. I, I have to, I have to move. I have to start doing. No time to whine right now. Exactly, exactly. But I thank you and you know, for sharing that you did take time to go through the process of grieving and then find out who it is in the season, like who you are. Like, what is this identity other than being a comedian? Other than being this, you know, raw dude, that's that we get the honor of sharing here. But, uh, you took time to actually understand, like, who am I like at the core? Who is this person that that is breathing that is sitting here? Because often times I find myself guilty of this several times throughout my life, especially in the last four or five years, especially after listening to you where I found my or my identity was tied into my kids, or it was tied into a season. So when that loss occurred, it was like the carpet was pulled underneath me, like I was just floundering in the wind. Like, who the hell am I? Yeah. And it was not like it was scary for me, you know, because for so many years, I, I, my identity was in my younger kids, my identity was in my businesses. My identity was this successful e-commerce dude. When that all was gone, it's like, hmm, what now? It was that. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. What now? Yeah. And what now? And that'll I mean, you discover both the good and the bad of who you are. Like I. Yeah. You know, in case you think that I've navigated this grief thing perfectly. Absolutely not. Because I'm one of the things. Oh, man. I don't know that I've ever shared this with anyone, but I'm. I mean, I have with personal friends, but not in a public setting. Um. One of the bad things that I discovered about myself. Uh, my son and I were out to a restaurant. It was probably, I don't know, I don't think it was within that first year. It might have been might have been the second year. Anyway, we're out at a restaurant and the waitress comes up and asks if we need anything. I said, no, you know? She walks away, and I suddenly realized I was checking out her ass. I'm like, whoa, it's been a long time since I've done that. Holy cow, I am single. I really am single, aren't I? Oh my gosh. So that was. And you're a dude. I'm a dude. Well, praise the Lord. I'm still a dude. That's good. You know, but. But you know. So I started, you know, pursuing relationships. And a couple of them were, were good. Uh, some of them not so good. And went a little too far in the relationship and lied to my kids about it. Um, and that shocked me, man, I, I cannot believe I'm telling you that I lied to my kids, but I did. I think we've all done that, man, to be honest with you, dude, if eBay says otherwise, they're lying. Yeah, exactly. I I've I've done the same. Right? Sure. I'm not proud of it. Sure. You know. So, man, I appreciate you having the courage to share that, uh, you know, because I know speaking from personal experience here, there have been times where I've lied to my kids about things and things that I'm not so proud of, things that, you know, that happened before they were born between my wife and I and things, you know, even after they were born, you know, there was a version of me that I'm not proud of, things that I did as a, as a husband that I'm not proud of. Mhm. And, um, yeah, I certainly understand that, man. And, uh, takes a lot of courage to, to share those things. So I appreciate that. Um, what was the, what was that you told me the hardest moment you shared right there, but, um, you know, why, why do you think you were what made you lie about that? Like, what made you do that? Um, knowing the reaction that I would get from my kids, you know, and Being too focused on what I think is best for me and not having the courage to say, all right, I need to break it off with this woman because this is not going to a good place. You know, instead of that, I kept going, thinking, no, this, this can work. It can get better. And, um, well, you also lied to yourself though, too, then. Oh, yeah. Right. Oh, yeah, I did. Yeah, I did. You know, and it's ironic how it's actually easier for us to lie to ourselves than it is to, you know, to lie to other people. You know, it sure is. But man, that. He got deep in here, man. Oh my gosh. Got deep for for for hair moments. Heck yeah. So in that season, did you even recognize yourself? No. Right. No. Uh, drinking way too much, you know, seriously there. Yeah. There was not processing. Life in a good way. So when did that moment occur? When you finally looked yourself in the mirror. Metaphorically speaking and realized, man, something's got to change. I don't like this person. Yeah, it just it just got to a point with that woman where I realized this is never going to like she she was she was bipolar. And so conversations with her were, you know, but it just got to a point where I realized this is never going to work and I cannot bring this into my home. I can't do that to my kids. I can't do that to me. And I can't do that to Dawn's memory. Right. You know this. I mean, this was this was probably for three years, four years after she died. And I'm thinking, nah, I can't do that. So yeah, I just had to get real. I just had to get real and say, you know, I, I'm done with this and I'll be honest. You know, I repaired my relationship with a couple of my kids and didn't with a couple others. Like I have a couple kids that don't talk to me today. Really? Yeah. And, you know, I pray for him every day. Yeah. Um. Well, I'm going to ask you to be bold for a second. Yep. What would you tell them right now? Like, what if I had them sitting right next to me? What would you tell them? Like, what would you want them to hear right now? I'm open to any conversation. You want to have both the uncomfortable. Uncomfortable. The uncomfortable conversation. Good. Bad. Ugly. Yeah. So like, like I say, they don't talk to me, but I'll text him happy birthday. They'll say thanks. I'll text him. Hey, I got a piece of mail for you. Okay? Just send it on to me or whatever. But we don't talk meaningful conversations. We don't talk. Right? Yeah, right. Yeah. There is a stark difference between the pleasantries, right? The the and the intent, the intimate, intentional conversations that, uh, we, we must have not should we must have. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And that the youngest that was eight when her mom died. She and I are, are best buddies. We are the absolute best of friends. She's getting married this October. Uh, she's the only one who still lives at home. And we. We are truly best friends. I'm. I'm so richly blessed there. That's awesome. That's great to hear. Congratulations, by the way. Thank you. Um, look, for I do follow you on socials, so I get to see some of these things. So I look forward to seeing you walking down the aisle and fulfilling that dream of, of not just yours, but of hers too. Right? Um, she's still your, you know her. You're still her superhero. Yup. Um. For now. Yeah. For now. For now, he's he's a good. He's a really good guy. I like him, but more importantly, I like who she is with him. Ooh. That's that's the important part. Agree I agree. Man. I agree with you, man. There's so much I want to cover here today. but our time is coming to an end. But I say coming to an end. But I sense there's probably a part two. Maybe even a part three of this conversation because, um, I always enjoy talking to you, man. I really do always enjoy talking to you and me being in the presence, you know, just being around you, man. Always enjoy conversations. But, uh, in that season, as we, as we start to climb out of this, out of this season where you that of life that you're starting to experience now, right? This highlight reel that I mentioned in the beginning, you said in your intake that, uh, what that season taught you ultimately is that God is always good. Yeah. All ways. Right? Yeah. Um, so, you know, Jeff, you know, your, you know, your wife just died. You're standing in front of seven kids, relationships are breaking to that person that's listening. What I just said right there, they're probably thinking, well, I've been thinking a lot of things. Either they're rolling their eyes right now or what have you, right? Maybe they're they're having their own version of your life right now. Sure. Um, so how do you say God is always good, right? Walk me through how you got there and what makes you think that? Actually, talk to this, Jeff. If if that Jeff is sitting right here. What? Help him understand that. Sure. So it's not an easy thing to do, but the thing to do is to separate your circumstances from truth. Okay? Circumstances are circumstances. Okay. Oh, I just got in an accident. Oh, I have the flu. Oh, I just lost ten thousand dollars in a bad business. Oh, my kids. I just lied to my kids, you know? You know, whatever it is. Okay? Yeah, there's there's circumstances can be crap. They can be real crap, right? But the temptation for us is to say, why did you let this happen? Right? And to to get on God for it and to say, I thought you said you loved me. I thought you said you'd protect me. I thought you said you'd provide for me. That's really easy to go there. Okay. And of course it is. It's a natural. And the thing is, this is a great thing. He knows that it's a natural reaction. So if we do that, you know, you read the Psalms and David's like, you've abandoned me. You've left me to die. You did this, this. Well, that's crap, you know? And David knows in his spirit that it's crap and God knows it's crap. So God's like, alright, get done with your rant and then let's get back to reality, okay? so truth is truth and truth doesn't change and God doesn't change. And so if Scripture says that I'm healed by the stripes of Jesus, but I think that I have this heart murmur, I've got, you know, my blood pressure, my kidneys are whatever it is, whatever it is, you know, I'm not saying don't go to the doctor. Definitely go to the doctor. Okay. But. Right. Yeah. I'm not saying I'm not going there. No, no, no, I'm not, I'm not. I'm not doing that business. But a problem in your kidney or your heart or whatever it is, is not your nature. It's your circumstance. Okay. But your nature in Christ is you have been healed by his stripes. He bore your sicknesses on the cross. So line up with with the truth, right? The truth is, God will always protect me. He will always provide for me. Okay, this circumstance happened and I got. You know, rear ended and now I've got an injury or whatever it is, or I lost money in this. You know, whatever it is, that's a circumstance. It's not my nature. Okay? So. So why does stuff happen? Well, because we're in a sin stained world and the enemy roams around doing his thing. Okay, but my nature is. I'm not a citizen of this world. Okay, so my my nature is in Christ. So if I want to know what the truth is. I should go to the word and find out. You know, I will never, ever, ever leave you. I will never, ever forsake you. Well. That's cool. Okay. And that sounds really Pollyanna. I'm not saying ignore your circumstances. You know, don't plug your ears and pretend everything's okay. That's. That's dumb. Right? You still have to deal with your circumstances, but deal with your circumstances from a position of victory. Don't deal with your circumstances from a position of defeat and fear. Oh, right. Because we are more than conquerors in Christ. So. Oh, I just lost ten grand. All right, Jesus, let's figure out how we how we get that back. How do we take care of this? Oh, I've got a problem. All right, listen, Jesus. I'm going to the doctor. But I know that my healing, my health, my life is in you. So now let's go to the doctor and and and approach that. So you're approaching it from a position of I'm in Christ, therefore I am victorious. Rather than, oh crap, I was in Christ. But now this happened. And so now I'm now I'm a sick person. Now I'm a poor person. Now I'm a defeated person. No you're not. That's not your nature. It's not your nature. So that's what I would say is learn how to divide circumstances from truth. Man oh man. There's some major wisdom knowledge drops right now. Real quick before you go. If you're still with me this deep into the episode, something in it hits you. Maybe it was the guest. Maybe it was just one line. Either way, you're still here. And that feeling in your chest right now, that's the signal. Lean in on that. Most people get a signal like that and they do nothing with it. They close the app. Life rushes back in. The moment's gone. Six months later, they're in the exact same spot. I don't want that for you. I built the playbook method for this exact moment. The one right after the stir when you're still open. Five pillars. The same five I walk every client through. Free video series. And you can start it tonight. No fluff, no ninety minute webinar. Just the playbook. If you're going to do something with what you heard today, do this. Go to the playbook method dot com one more time, the playbook method dot com. And hey, before I let you go, thank you for riding with me this long. It means a lot more than you know. Thank you. Wow. Thank you. Because I'm sure there are a lot of people listening that needed to hear this. And what you described right there reminds me of two things that I that I hear from two individuals. One is in my lap. Everything happens for you, not to you. Right? Yeah. That's good. We have to we have to acknowledge that. Right. And there's another phrase I heard several months ago by Jocko Willink, who essentially said, right. Yes. So Jocko, if you if you're listening to this right now, major props to you on this. But every time I hear after, especially after what you just said, I reminded of good. You get that promotion. Good. You got your ass handed to you. Good. Yes. Right. Because it forces you to go back and learn the lesson and and recalibrate and Rebuild, right? So, uh, especially as a believer, especially as, you know, we both are. Um, it is hard to navigate life where things happen, quote unquote for you, but we often come from. I say often, yes, we often times say like, you know, why God, are you doing especially if it comes to a loss? I know there are a lot of parents out there. I know several of them off the top of my head that are very, very angry with God right now because for them, you know, God took them away from them, right? They took their kids or they took their spouse, or they took their loved one or so forth. And so by nature, especially as you said, we, we just, we ultimately blame him like he, you know, said, huh? Now it's his time. You know, we live in a free, free will world. How to make sure I said that, you know, clearly. Yeah. And, uh, it's all free will, right? And so thanks for sharing that, dude, because, uh, that was a good reminder for me, man, because I'm, I'm navigating some loss in my, in my life. Um, and, uh, I know a lot of people out there are navigating some type of season, navigating some type of loss where they needed to be reminded of this, right? And subconsciously, we know, but a lot of times we just need to hear it again. Like, hey, yeah, bro, God is there. God is with you. Yes. You're going to go through some turbulent times. Nowhere in the Bible does it say you're never going to experience hardships, right? Right. You know, so in fact, he gives you I say he gives you he allows us to experience this, this human experience, to experience hardships so we can give the testimony for other people to inspire them through hardships and through testimony. You know, through the things that they're going through, things that you went through, things that I gone through. Yeah, right. The very end of Psalm thirty four. Uh, many are the tribulations of the righteous, but the Lord God delivers him out of them all. We're going to have many problems, but God is always faithful to deliver us. Agree somehow. I think as a society, we've normalized, uh, success. But not when I say this, not normalized the other side of success, not normalize adversity. We didn't we we've lost that normalization, right? We've forgotten to normalize adversity, failure, hardships. Like there's now there's something wrong. If we have some type of adversity or some type of hardship. Yeah, yeah, man, I remember. So I told you we had several years when we were trying to create a business where things were just really bad for us financially, and it put a strain on our marriage. I mean, it was it was difficult. I remember going out for a prayer walk once and it was middle of winter, so it was like below zero. It was just stupid cold, you know? And I'm walking across this, this icy parking lot or whatever. And I slipped and fell and I got up, walked a little bit more and I slipped and fell and I slipped and fell like three or four times. And I said, God, why do I keep falling? And he. Listen to this. Listen to this, Carl. He said, you keep falling because you keep getting up. Oh, oh, say that again. Please say that again. Say that again. I said, Lord, why do I keep falling? And he said, because you keep getting up. HMM. Mhm. Now I got goosebumps, right? Whew, man. I mean, I could have made the choice to just lay there. Yeah, till my wife came and said. What are you doing? Right. Yeah, right. Yeah, I could have just laid there and felt sorry for myself. Yeah, but think about that, though. Had you done that as a father? How does that set an example? Yeah. How's that set an example for your kids and people that are looking to you now to, to be the provider, to be the protector, to be the example. Mhm. Right. Yeah. To GA Lee, man, this has gotta be one of the most knowledge packed, wisdom packed podcast episodes I've done to date, man. I got goosebumps, dude. Man, there's definitely got to be more volumes to this man. More volumes to this, for sure. Uh. As we start to wrap up, I want to. I want you to drop some one more thing that you mentioned on your episode, because I want to make sure I extract this because I'm a person that believes wholeheartedly in, in this is relationships, right? You said relationships are the one thing that you attribute success to is your, your, your is relationships. And I wholeheartedly believe that success in life is because of relationships, business, personal life, every relationship with with your creator. Yeah. Um, you know that that is the key, right? So in your words, number one, no contest, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah. So, you know, for for a man who lost his primary relationship, then fractured relationships with your own kids. That's a pretty bold statement, and that's probably what led you to say this. But I want to hear you, you know, walk me through how you, uh, you know, how you rebuild what was broken. Like, how does that translate to now being one of the most non-negotiables in your life? Yeah. So, um, so that period where I was, you know, pursuing a woman that I shouldn't have been pursuing, right? My focus was on the wrong type of relationship. I was thinking, oh, I've got to, you know, replace my wife. What I should have been more focused on was, first of all, my relationship with God, obviously, but also a stronger relationship with brothers. You know, who can help me, who can help speak truth into my life. That's that was what I needed more than I needed feminine companionship at that time. Right? Um, yes. And I mentioned Rabbi Lapin earlier. Uh, if anyone watching this, if you don't know who Rabbi Lapin is, you really need to look him up. He has the best teaching on biblical economics that I've. I've ever, ever read. Um, anyway, he talks about your your wealth is not measured in the numbers in your bank account, but the number of quality relationships that you have. Now we hear that and we think, oh, yeah, I don't need money. I just need a bunch of friends. You know, that's not what he's talking about. Okay. That's not what he's talking about at all. Right? I'm just happy. I'm just happy with my friends and the squirrels and the birds and. No, no, no, no, that's not it. What he's talking about is the more quality people that you know, the more you can do things for each other. so, you know, somebody says, oh man, my toilet's backed up. I don't know anything about plumbing. And you go, I know a guy who's a really good plumber, and you make that connection. Okay, so I'm a musician, right? I'm in the local music scene. Okay? And I've got dozens of numbers in my phone of trombone players, clarinet players, violin players, drummers, you know. So we're playing here and somebody goes, man, I wish I knew a good alto sax player. I got a guy, right? I know a guy. I know a guy. I know a guy. I can hook you up. Okay. Um, literally. All right. I know we're coming to the end of this, but I want to keep going, man. Go for it, man. Keep going man. That's okay. Twenty sixteen, I took three of my girls to New York, and we spent a week in New York and attended the first Broadway con, like Comic Con, but it was all about Broadway. Okay, okay. And it was so cool. And one of the sessions, in fact, several of the sessions, I heard people saying this, um, one session was on stage managing and a lady said, what degree should my son get? He wants to be a stage manager. And the panel was like, do you have a degree? Do you have a degree? No, I don't have a degree. And they're like, it's not about a degree. It's just about the connections you make, right? Start doing local theater. Get to know people. Eventually your name's going to get passed around. It's all about relationship. That kind of thing is all about relationship. So. Yep. I told you, uh, in the, in the, the lead in that, you know, I'm ridiculously, abundantly blessed. One of those ways is in my business. Twenty twenty five. I doubled my sales over twenty twenty four this year. Year to date, I'm twenty percent up over twenty twenty five. That's because I changed business models in twenty twenty four. And here's the thing, Carl. I didn't come up with the idea. The Lord dropped it on a friend of mine who said, hey, would you be interested in doing this? I'm like, okay, sure. This the connection, the relationship, relationship and my business has grown entirely by word of mouth since then. So when I say relationship, I'm serious man. Yeah, I think that I love to hear your thoughts on this. And this is something I've had to shift my belief on. And you touched on this, right? But we often hear, you know, rich, you know, uh, and I actually heard this from Tony Robbins. It's like you could be rich in your bank account, right? But just be a poor man with a rich bank account, right? But if you're not rich in your relationships, if you're not rich in these areas, you're not rich. You're just a poor man with a rich bank account, right? And so as you're talking through this, in my opinion and my belief, which is pretty strong right now, is that is where your, your wealth is, is truly at is the relationships and the people that you have in your life. Because to your point earlier, you know, had you grounded yourself very well in other men in that season of life that you're in, it would likely have would have changed your trajectory. Absolutely. In that. Right? Yeah. And that's not to say you regret any of that. Like we are where we are because this is where God wants us, right? Like we've had to go through these things. And, you know, so that's not to say there's any regret. There is this there was there was a lesson that you learned in that season, right? Was to really invest in relationships, men. So ladies out there invest into other ladies, which for whatever reason, ladies just happen to gravitate towards, you know, they're naturals at that. They don't have to work at it like you do, right? Exactly. For us dudes, man, it's just that's that's just the air we default on, right? So dudes, please take the take this lesson that we're that you're hearing right now. Go out there, get uncomfortable, you know, you know, rub elbows with other men that are in the same journey with you, growth focus believers, people that are going to stretch you, that's going to push you, encourage you not just, you know, boys that you hang out with the bar. We don't we're not talking about those kind of men. Right. Right. So fast forward today. I'm glad you. You were talking about some recent successes. So fast forward today. You're a granddad of two. You've got the the Sorcerer's apprentice. Uh, you're coaching. You're speaking on stages. What are you fired up the most about right now in this season that you're in? Oh man. So many things. You know, so many things. Seriously. Not like not just business like, yeah, my business is going great. And I, I'm just about at the place where my capacity for it is maxed out. So I need to think about, I know I need to think about scaling it beyond where I'm at right now. And it's, it's eminently scalable. Right? Um, I found out last night that I'm going to be a granddad for the third time. So that's exciting, right? Right. Congratulations. Yeah, that's super exciting. Um. Music wise, I joined a new band a couple months ago, and they are. Good for you. Oh my gosh, they've got gigs all over the place and they are so much fun to play with. So that's that's exciting too. Um. Like I said, my daughter's getting married in October. That's. Yeah. That's super. You got a lot going on. I do have a lot going on. Uh, church is wonderful. I have a wonderful church family. They're very real. They're very relatable. Um, no pretense, you know? Yeah. So that's awesome. I'm just excited to see. How much more I can focus on the voice of the Lord and continue to be obedient, because it's really easy to get off track there. And to think, oh, things are Things are going great. Now I can I can sit back and chill, you know. No way. Yeah. You better not do that. Yeah. That's not it's easy, man. It it really is. I, I call that being seduced by success. Yep. Uh, yep. You know, it is really easy to let off the gas when you start to get some momentum and, uh, yeah, get seduced by success. And, uh, I'm often reminded that God, God's like, hey, uh, I'm the rudder, but I'm not the oars. Like, you still gotta do the right thing, bro. Right. You know, and, uh, so it's usually those lessons where it's, you know, uh, decline of sales or whatever, you know, where God's like, hey, I told you to keep rowing, right? So man, it I'm on, I'm genuinely happy for you, my dude, because, you know, sharing the things that you shared in this in the trials and tribulations where easily you could have just easily have blamed God and be like, you know, and, and been bitter and had this victim mentality. And really, you and I are likely would not have talked or are not talking right now. Right? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Instead, you know, you instead you're like, mm, you took the harder road. Yeah. I know two men that lost their lives pretty close to the same time I lost mine. And a couple years later, I followed up with them. One guy got married, like within seven months of his wife passing. Wow. And I thought, did. I mean, I'm not going to judge if the Lord did that, right? I know, I know, but you know, are you just trying to cover things up? Are you trying to, like, put a bandaid on it before? Did you actually, like you said, did you? Does this dude actually grieve? Right. That's a valid question. Yeah. The other guy, two years later, was still going to the cemetery like three times a week and crying over his wife's tombstone and drinking really heavily. And I thought, are you processing it? Are you are you or are you just sitting on the. And I'm like, man, that could either one of those guys could have been me. Yeah, right. Yes, yes, yes. And it's easy. Like any one of those roads is you. It's just as easy in my opinion. In my belief, it is easy to take takes the same amount of effort, takes the same amount of, um, easiness, if you will, to proceed. Either one of those down those roads. Right. Um, so man, my dude, I am An amazing hour that we shared together. Man, I really, you know, appreciate your time together with you. So for the person that's listening who's thinking, you know, I want to learn more about what Jeff does and support you and encourage you or just to connect with you, man. Uh, what's the best way for, you know, they can connect with you, right? Well, the best way is probably you mentioned sources apprentice. Uh, that's a Facebook group I have, and it's not Sorcerer's Apprentice like Mickey Mouse cartoon thing, right? It's no wizardry, no wizardry. It's sorcerer. S o u r c e r s Sorcerer's Apprentice. That's probably the best. That Facebook group is. Probably the best way to to get started connecting with me. Awesome. I'll definitely be putting that into the show notes. You know, where they can connect with you. I know you're active in other platforms like Facebook, so I'll definitely be dropping that in the show notes, Right? Cool. Um, yeah, man, this is this has been, you know, an amazing time together. Uh, I, I know we could go for a minimum another hour or two. Just keep, you know. Right. Um, you said you had a message, uh, for all the individuals out there and, you know, I could say this, but I actually want you to say it, right? I want you to look in the camera. Say it like you're talking to that version of yourself. You know, stand in the house back in August of twenty fourteen with seven kids and no answers. What does that message that you got to share? Yeah. Um, I would say it doesn't look like it, but God is good. He is always good. He is always working for your good. Always love it, man. And he wants you to succeed. Absolutely love it, man. Cool. As we wrap up, I've got some rapid fire questions for you, my dude. Um, so in this, you know, what is in this season that you're in? What is your definition of grit? Grit. Oh, man. Grit is getting back up again. That whole thing about. Yes, you're going to fall. Yes. Get back up again. Like when I talk to like super successful, like, you know, multi multi multi-millionaire people. Um, yeah, most of them say, yeah, I've gone bankrupt. Uh, I lost count. I don't know how many times. Right? Yep. And yeah, for a lot of us bankruptcy is like, oh my gosh, I'm a failure. I'm so stupid. You know, I'm going to go work at McDonald's and you know, would you like fries with that? But that's not what they do. They get back up again. That is grit. Yeah. I mean, that's that's a great that's a great definition of grit, man. Um, and especially in that last part, I think that's one of the biggest separators between successful and those that are not successful is giving yourself permission to fail and fail fast, right? Fail and fail fast. Extract the lessons and leave everything. Leave. Leave it there. Leave it behind you right where it belongs. So love it, man. All right. Because in this season, for me personally, in this season and you know, you hear a lot of talk about adding systems, adding strategy, adding, adding, adding, adding. But I'm also the belief that subtraction is also required for growth, right? You've got to subtract something, subtraction, some friction, subtracting a believe something you had to unlearn or anything in nature. So in this season, what is one thing or maybe something you could tell yourself ten or fifteen years ago? Um, you know what it would be? What would you tell yourself to stop doing? Or what is it that you currently stop doing that you want to stop doing? Um, really anything that I don't feel is, um, what's the word I want to use? I almost said edifying. I don't know if that's the word I want to use, but it's, I can't think of a better one right now. So it's, and it's a constant evaluation. You know, it's not like, well, I've always done this. You know, there are things that I do. Like I said, there are things I do today that my wife and I did together when she was alive. And yeah. But if it doesn't matter that we did them and that I've done this for fifteen years or whatever, when the day comes that that doesn't feel like it's serving me, like it's adding to my life. I'm going to drop it. Um, my, my girlfriend comes over to my house and she loves working in my business with me. So, you know, one day I'm sure we'll be working the business together, you know? But, uh, her dad asked her if I had a retirement plan, and she said no. He loves what he does too much. He's not going to. Yeah. And so I thought about that and I'm like, yeah, I well, first of all, I don't see that retirement is in the Bible anywhere. But secondly, I guess my retirement plan is if one day I look around at my business and I go, man. That's the time to package the business up and sell it to somebody else. Yeah, that's my retirement plan. So even as much as I love my business right now. One day I wake up and I'm like, this isn't this isn't adding to my life. Well, okay, that's time to package it up and sell it. Great wisdom man. Great wisdom. I hope those who are listening, I know that was a hard thing I had to swallow was, uh, selling something that or subtracting something that was never serving me. I kept doing it because that's what I knew. Yes. And, uh, you know, it's easy to fall victim to that. So cool. Man. Uh, the last two questions I prepared you for in the green room, uh, that require a little bit more thought. Uh, I call this the directive in any moment or season, man, will you just down in the trenches. Maybe it could be a moment of darkness or or anything of that nature. What is a quote or directive or anything that you tell yourself or that you to pull yourself through in that moment or while you're in the trenches. I wish I had heard this before I came up to my studio. By the way, this is not a green screen here. Okay, that's actually that's actually a mural that I put up when my son was like nine years old. Oh, but I turned this in. I turned this into my studio because that's a freaking cool backdrop, right? Anyway, it is actually down in my office. I have a big sign on my desk right in front of my face, and it's three words. You don't suck. Oh, that's, that's the phrase that I look at when, when I, when I'm down and I'm kicking myself in the ass and I'm thinking I am the worst businessman. I'm the worst father. I'm the worst human. I'm the worst, whatever. I look up at that sign. You don't suck. I love that. Yeah. You know, and actually, you know what, uh, you know, every, everything that we do for the first, second, two, three, four or five times, we are going to suck at it. Absolutely. But that doesn't mean that you suck. Agree, right. Agree. Yes. Not your neighbor. Agree. Reminds me, I interviewed a guest a couple of. Well, I say a couple of months ago. Seems like a couple of months ago, but, uh, a couple of weeks ago, Diana or Diana and her mantra for most of her life, it reminds me of what you shared with me is this too shall pass. Yeah. Right. Yeah. This too shall pass. And that goes for both sides. The good and the bad. Absolutely right. We often equate it to to the bad. But. And even in the good. Right? And it's high time that you're in. Yeah. This too shall pass. Absolutely. So awesome. All right. This last question is a two part, um. You know, I always love and those for the listening for the first time, I love to ask my guests, what would they love to ask my next guest? It could be something they navigate and they would love to hear somebody else's input on, or maybe something that means something to them. And this guest lineup is completely anonymous. So I didn't tell Jeff who my next guest is, uh, or any guests for that matter. So it is completely anonymous. And so far every question has landed perfectly. So, Jeff, don't ruin it for us. No. I'm kidding. So before I get moving, uh, because when I first started this, I oftentimes forgot to ask the last part. So I'm going to ask the last part first. What is the question that you will love to ask my next guest with? Like, what would be the one thing that you will love to ping them with? Right? Um, how do you Evaluate yourself not just how you see yourself, not just ask others how they evaluate you. How do you evaluate yourself? I love that. And looking at my guest lineup, it's perfect dude. Oh, good. It's perfect. Okay. That worked. I know right? No pressure, no pressure, no pressure. Awesome. Awesome. Alright, so the question for you, uh, from a previous guest is, what are you working for? Like, it's probably not the money, but what is it like? What is the true thing that you're working for? Wow. That's good. Um, right. I'm working to fulfill my purpose in the Kingdom. So my favorite, my favorite Bible verse is one that I've never heard anyone preach on. I've never heard anyone else say it's their favorite verse. It's Genesis forty one thirty eight and it's when Joseph Pharaoh had his dreams about the corn and the cows and everything, and he's like, I'm going to kill all you guys because you can't interpret my dream. And they said, wait, there's this crazy little skinny Hebrew that we captured and he can interpret your dream. So they pulled Joseph out of the prison. Joseph comes up and he goes, the Lord says, this is what your dream means. Genesis forty one thirty eight Pharaoh says, can we find a man like this in whom is the Spirit of God? That's the phrase I want on my tombstone. Ooh, I want people to say, can we find a man like this in whom is the Spirit of God? So that's what I'm working for. I'm working to Be filled with the Spirit of God. Oh man, what an amazing hour. We spent tons, tons and tons of wisdom here, my man. Wow, man. Thank you, thank you. Know this this has been amazing. And dude, thank you so much again for not just showing the highlight reels and just showing the, the good numbers, right? Because if you look on social media, man, that's all we see is the good stuff. Yeah. Look at me. You know, look at this fancy car. Look at my sales numbers. Look at this, look at this. But you allowed us a sneak peek behind the scenes of some darkness. You had to go through a season of life where, man, your world was rocked. Yeah, right. Yeah. And you could have easily have gone in a completely different direction, but instead you decided not chose because in your mind, there were no other options, right? You decided to choose this path that you chose. My man, I honor you and I respect you big time for not just those decisions, but I respect you and honor you for sharing what you've shared today, man. So thank you. Thanks for the opportunity, man. Absolutely. Absolutely, man. It's got to be another. There's got to be. In fact, I don't let the audience. I'm going to let the audience, you know, to give us feedback on if there's going to be another version, because I think there is going to be another episode. Um, all right, so to those that are listening and watching, as you well know, the gap between average and excellence is just merely action. As Jeff's shirt says, stop whining and start doing man, right there again. Oh yes. Love it. So if you're watching YouTube, you're seeing this. If you're listening to audio, we'll hop over to YouTube in and look at it. So don't just listen to Jeff, guys. Don't just listen to this conversation. Take one thing he shared and guys, he shared so much. How could you not take at least one thing? It could be harnessing on relationships. So guys, surround yourself with men, right? There's so much that's been dropped today. Just use it in the next twenty four hours and be the reason somebody doesn't quit today. Please don't get this. Keep this to yourself. Be someone. Be that light. Share this episode because someone in your circle needs to see it and or needs to watch it. So send it to him right now. Jeff. Again, my dude, thank you so much for stepping in. It was such an honor to spend this time with you. So thank you man. Thank you Carl, this is great. Absolutely. Looking forward to doing it again I'm sure.